Tuesday, April 14, 2009

A Mother's Mumblings

I’ve seriously got to watch my mumblings.

I’m talking about those under the breath comments a mother makes as her children talk smack, or spill their milk for the third time that day, or when her five-year-old decides to talk like a baby ALL DAY LONG.

In the South, if you listen closely, you’ll hear mother mumblings like this:

for cryin’ out loud, for Heaven’s sake, for Pete’s sake, and my favorite, have mercy

Don’t get me wrong, a mother’s mumblings are a good thing. After all, frustrations must escape somehow, and mumblings are way better than a yell.

But like I mentioned, I need to watch my mumblings, because the children are tuning in.

Here’s the scenario.

Yesterday, we suffered a series of potty-training setbacks.

While on my hands and knees wiping up pee, I told Blondie to take off her wet clothes, and in her struggle to remove her pee-soaked panties, she flung them right in my face.

I was too stunned to speak, so she spoke for me.

“Mommy, was that for heaven sake?”

I laughed. But not out loud, because I had pee on my lips.

You love that story, don’t you?

Moving along, now...

BooMama's post today inspired me to share something salty.
When I crave salt, there's nothing that hits the spot more than these chips. Go here to see why blue corn is slightly better for you than yellow corn. It's also important to mention that taking this bag with you to the sofa will prove detrimental to your diet. You WILL eat the whole bag, so please please please grab a bowl and a handful of chips, then put the bag AWAY!!

You'll thank me later when you're trying on bathing suits.


3 Bay B Chicks said...

Oh. My. Goodness.

I should know better than to sip my coffee while reading your posts. I am now cleaning up the coffee that I spit at the screen because I was laughing so hard.

If you can break away from your A-list celebrity-like lifestyle (similar to my own), can you tell me if you'll be joining us for Chick Chat? Just want to make sure that you can put something together this weekend and be ready to post next Wednesday.


ymK said...

'was that a heaven's sake' made me laugh so hard. I have had problems trying not to laugh at these moments, but how do they come up with such things?

Tiffany said...

Okay... seriously... I have to quit reading these posts! I've almost peed my pants! I'm right there with you, girl. Yesterday my 3 1/2 year old son was wiggling around on the floor on his back and scratching his, uh hum.. how do I say.. uhm.. nether regions.

His comment to me (surely because of the horrified look on my face) was, "Oh dear, honey. My penis is scratchie again. What am I to do..now tell me, what am I to do?"

I dare not answer.

3 Bay B Chicks said...

I am worried that I am on your site and there is no video.

Have you gone through the entire six pack of beer by now?

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